So Can Anybody Be President?

President Bundy

President Bundy

The American Dream, the doctrine that, in America, anyone can be anything they want, even President of the United States. And it’s true, anyone of any political party be it Democrat, Republican, or Socialist; of any religion, Catholic, Protestant, or Muslim can hold the highest office in the land.

Barrack Obama is living proof of the dream, not because he’s black but because he’s patently unqualified.

Obama effortlessly, and I mean effortlessly, rose to power without any valid credentials. He’d never had any governing experience, never even had a real job, hung out with terrorists, attended an anti-American church, and had a history of bashing capitalism and individual liberty. Yet he was elected President, twice.

So if Obama could win elections with that kind of baggage, who else might pull it off?

Just for giggles, I’m going to look at a Ted Bundy candidacy, just for fun. After all, Ted did volunteer work for a presidential campaign, was a Convention delegate, and worked on a gubernatorial re-election. What if Ted’s short-lived political career had attracted enough attention to make him a candidate for the President of the United States instead of the electric chair? We’ll fudge a couple of facts, make the year, oh say 2008, and Ted, umm, 47 years old and of course he’s never been caught for the murders, or at least there’s no real proof.

*****

The year is 2008 and ‘they’ (‘they’ being D.C. power brokers and political allies) have found their perfect candidate, a volunteer on a Governor’s campaign named Ted Bundy. Ted has it all; he’s good looking, charismatic, and a lawyer of sorts. He did drop out of Law School but then nobody’s perfect and ‘they’ can just bury his college transcripts, claim he actually is a lawyer; no one will be the wiser.

But does Ted have an acceptable backstory?

You betcha, he has a good education, worked in community service, and did a couple of stints in politics that impressed the movers and shakers at the top of the campaigns.

Of course a candidate has to be articulate, able to dazzle crowds with his oratory. Ted passes with flying colors, talks a good game so he would star in debates and stump speeches, and yes, he’s able to read scrolling text. No wonder ‘they’ latched onto this guy, he’s got credentials of a sort, will wipe the floor with debate opponents, hypnotize crowds, and he’s hot, a shoe?in.

And so the campaign begins…

‘They’ infiltrate Twitter, Facebook, and whatever other social media allows bogus unsubstantiated drivel to shape public opinion. ‘They’ finance a couple of push polls to put Ted in the lead and give the talking heads their talking points and all systems are go. Election day ‘they’ kick into high gear, bus thousands of illegal votes to the polls, mail in thousands of fraudulent absentee ballots and, if necessary, adjust final vote counts and Voilà, it’s President Bundy.

Things go smoothly at first.

Ted’s the President but ‘they’, the shadow government, are doing all the work. ‘They’ are the ones fighting a million little battles against voter or immigration laws, putting a halt to those disruptive honest elections. ‘They’ are the ones pitting American against American to fracture the people and secure their majority. And ‘they’ are the ones building an empire using the people’s money (taxes and fines) and making backroom deals for national healthcare and gun control.

Ted? Well, you can usually find him on the slopes. An avid skier he can now travel the world for the best locations, own the finest equipment, and have the mountain to himself thanks to Secret Service. In fact he can mobilize the entire Air Force One entourage with the snap of his fingers and often does. The cost, millions of dollars to the taxpayers, but they don’t care. As long as they get their daily affirmation from their phone friends, they’re happy – happy and oblivious.

Of course President Bundy doesn’t have a clue what’s going on in the country much less the world. He did a memory dump of the countries and their leaders along with all the economic gibberish right after the election. And he’s not getting any news from his staff since he can’t bear all the stupid meetings. More often than not, he just walks out and tells them to send him the minutes, which he never reads.

So life goes on.

The handlers and media keep making Ted look good while President Bundy gives new meaning to an empty suit.

But what happens when Teddy can’t control himself and the downstairs maid suddenly disappears? Even if ‘they’ weren’t aware of his previous victims, the evidence is pretty clear that their guy just killed someone, in the White House. No way out of this one, ‘they’ have to expose the crime, right?

Wrong.

The insiders who know what happened will move quickly to cover up the incident. Not a problem since they have the entire alphabet in their pockets, the CIA, FBI, AG, NSA, DHS, ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN and the list goes on.

Whichever party got this goon elected, (let’s just say Democrats for the heck of it) is not going to chance losing their seats over some cleaning woman. In fact they won’t risk their power for anything, no bar too low for this crowd.

However even a room full of power brokers can’t control the world and the day comes when Ted’s going to at least have to look like he’s in charge. An International incident pops onto the radar and the stupid puppet in the White House suddenly takes himself seriously. He mouths off that the U.S. is going to bomb some third-world country, start WWIII maybe, and ‘they’ are having a hard time explaining to him that it was all just an act.

‘They’ talk him into a stall tactic while ‘they’ figure out the best political outcome for the ‘crisis’. Ted backs down as instructed but he’s not happy, he looks weak and the world is calling him on it. In fact, he’s not just unhappy, he’s furious. He starts to defend himself to the press, “he’s not an amateur, didn’t say that, didn’t back down, yada yada.” But his fury is thinly veiled and it’s frightening to watch.

Then, somewhere in the middle of this mess, President Bundy figures it out, that he can do whatever he wants. After all, he’s the most powerful man in the world and being a narcissistic psychopath, he knows best. The truth hits ‘them’ too late.

Bottom line, if Ted wants to push the button, it’s a go and not even ‘they’ can stop him.

*****

Ok, this was just a story, an exercise in fiction. Yet there’s something strangely familiar about a Bundy Presidency, like I’ve heard it before. But that’s ridiculous, nothing like that could actually happen.

After all, ‘they’ can’t just plop anyone they want into the Oval Office, right?  . . . . right?

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